Do you like him because you like him, or because he likes you?

Many of us at least have ever had asked our dates, "Why do you like me?" But girls, why do you end up with him?

He's smart. He's funny. He's rich. He's experienced.

But what if he does not treat you well?

Do you still like him?

How do we usually describe a guy? He's sweet. He's cute. We tend to measure a guy by how much he has done for us, don't we?

Yes, I've said that we all love jerks. Because the one that wins us by treating us well is not always our best choice.

I've been thinking that maybe it is right- men do know what love is, whereas women only choose to be with a man that knows how to treat her well. In the very beginning, we are attracted to certain attributes to this guy. Later on, it is how they treat us that decides whether we want to carry on or not. In the past, I was very still young. If this guy did only one thing I did not like, I would never be involved with him again, regardless the other 1,000 things he did for me. So I drove myself crazy. Now I look back, that was too immature. Our ultimate goal is to be happy. If he is perfect but he does not appreciate you, will you still be happy? Let me make this clearer. A has $10,000,000, but he would not give you anything. B has $500,000 and he gives you $100,000. Which do you want?

Be your own judge.

LOVE> School?

Recently, there is a hot video on Facebook where Michelle Obama was telling our fellow girls that there is no man at this age cute enough for us to forgo our education.

That's more than true, yes, from my real life experience.

So you may argue that maybe a mature man, say a 30 something or even a 40 something might be a different discussion. Well, honey, not really (yes, I've been there). One thing that we need to keep in mind is, what does an older man like about a girl in her early 20s? Of course, youth- many of us may not notice. But a 30 something and a 20 something do look different- I'd like to ascribe that to the loss of collagen, all those early wrinkles, sagging muscles.... If you are young, you are naturally beautiful- I am not just saying. Once you pass 20s and go on to 30s, what do you have? There are lots of young girls out there- they think they are smart and beautiful as what we now think we are. What would you do if you were the older man? Would you be stuck with an aging woman or looking for some young passion?

So here is the deal- girls, focus on your education/ career. Once you've stepped out of the path, it is not that easy to go back- at least it took me a lot of sweats to stay in the right track. Let me throw this out, you give up your education/ career to love him. So what do you mean by loving him? I mean, how? Just to be with him every day? Cooking, doing laundry, cleaning? Hmm, you are sure you want to do this? Come on, girls, you are just being lazy- you want him to pay your bills so that you can buy your nice shoes and clothes. Ok, I know you are going to say you like him not (only) because of his $$, but his personality and his experience. Honey, then why does he want to share his adventures and $$ with you if you are so easy to get and be replaced?

First of all, focus on your goal to make you a better person. It can also make him feel that you are not that easy- you are unavailable sometime, so that he will try to get you (we all like men making efforts to get us, right?). What's next? So when you get to your 30s, you are still fabulous- in the very beginning he might just be attracted to your appearance but as he knows more about you, he finds out you have a personality and everyday he's learning something new about you (oh, I start to like this version of you too). How would he not want to keep you? Well, if anything, he turns out to be a shallow jerk, you still have your career- you won't lose the world, but just creating more opportunities for yourself and other better men to be crazy for you...


Yours Truly ;)